[video] just enough of a bastard

[temptationaccomplished]

[Fell looks into the camera (he's obviously holding the phone) and takes a sip from the red in his bulbous wine glass.]

Well, this has been the first and absolutely last day of business for the Crowley Cousin Mover Company.

[He turns the camera around and you get a view of his studio apartment, in all its jewel-toned, eclectic vintage charm. If you've been to his flat, or had enough footage from a past video, you'll see he's acquired a new (to him, it's vintage of course), wooden desk. With the plethora of drawers, it looks exceedingly heavy, but it's been placed expertly into his crowded living space.

The Crowley Cousins in question, Alec and Anthony, are both obviously nursing sore muscles. Alec is laying on Aziraphale's vintage leather sofa. Anthony has an ice pack on his foot.]

Oh, I haven't broken you, have I? It's just a desk. Those strapping young men I hired made it look positively easy.

Comments

[scotch_egg]

Piss off. [he can't move. He hurts. It'll be better tomorrow but right now he can't take his face off the sofa.]

I'd like to see you lift it, you great pansy.

[temptationaccomplished]

Oh, don't be such a sour grape. If you wanted me to lift it so badly, you wouldn't have said yes to helping in the first place.

Though... I am awfully sorry. Can I get you any paracetamol? Some tea? [A quick glance at Anthony and then he decides against offering a little bit of whiskey.] I'm sure I have another frozen bag of vegetables you could use as an ice pack. Not sure what one does for impromptu heat packs--I suppose a wet towel in the oven would be a bad idea...?

[scotch_egg]

Mf. 'm fine. Don't fuss. Just let me lie here a bit. [he was not entirely sure he could get back up again, but that would come later]

Next time you can hire your second hand strippers from the beginning. [okay they had volunteered but he was still too grumpy to own up to it]

[temptationaccomplished]

[No, that's a job the two might actually be suited to do.]

Well, you let me know if I can help. I'll just get out the extra linens, shall I, in case this becomes an extended stay.

[scotch_egg]

Fine. I'll be gone soon. Twenty minutes. [even if he has to crawl]

[serpentinthegarden]

[ Lounging across a antique armchair like it was a chaise with his poor foot wrapped in frozen peas he glared daggers at Aziraphale as if his eye lasers might just cause him to spill that wine. ]

You'll think its funny when you have to carry me downstairs to an uber.

You can't hire strapping young men to do that and I'm not letting Alec anywhere near me after that stunning display of dexterity...

[temptationaccomplished]

[Despite the glare, Anthony gets a kiss on top of his head, then one on his forehead as Aziraphale runs his fingers through his hair. He's still running his fingers through Anthony's hair as he offers him his glass of wine.] As delightful as it would be, especially to see you carried off like a prince by some hired hands-- I'd just as soon keep you here. I'd hate to risk you incurring more injury.

[serpentinthegarden]

[ Kisses soothe the savage serpent and the wine once sipped worked to dull the throbbing in his injured foot. ]]

I wouldn't mind being treated like a Prince.

[ More softly spoken he reached out to capture the wine offering hand and press a kiss to his thumb. Capture him, keep him in your den of antiquities, he would be entirely content here packed in amongst the books so long as you were here... and he had an entertaining phone game to play when you were off reading. ]

What if it needs xraying?

[temptationaccomplished]

Does it, you think? Oh my dear. [As if the thought had only really just occurred to him and now he has a Concern. The fretting sets in. He should call an uber and get them to an urgent care.] Alec, too?

I hadn't meant to hurt you. I'm very sorry. Though you did both look very [He wishes he still had the wine.] ...professional right before disaster struck.

[serpentinthegarden]

Bit too soon to tell. I think...

[ He leaned back into Fell as best as he could with the arm of the chair holding him back. ]

It needs an hour or two on ice, maybe some more wine... Pizza would go down a treat. They must make gourmet pizza?

[ Fuss away Fell. He loves it!

Anthony's gaze only shifts away from this golden opportunity at the mention of Alec's name. He looked beat, but then he would wouldn't he? What sort of dumb idea had it been to help Fell with his desk when Alec could barely do stairs? Alec could stand to live in an urgent care. ]

You weren't the one who dropped the desk.

[ A glare at Alec, you know what you did. ]

But at least that's another fantasy fulfilled. Prince being carried out by young men, strapping furniture mover... What should se go for next, doctor and his charming patient?

video;

[phdmotherfucker]

Aw, what a shame. And here I was planning on some furniture shopping this weekend. I don't suppose they can be coaxed out of retirement?

[ She's kidding. Mostly. Really, carrying a sofa is the least they could do after that terrible blind date. ]

Your place looks nice.

[ If the bare white wall behind her and vague echo on the audio is anything to go by, her own apartment is terribly underdecorated. ]

video;

[temptationaccomplished]

Perhaps for some pizza? I believe they can be bought.

Thank you. [There's a pleased little wiggle and a nose scrunch.] I do like to think I have a flair for picking out pieces. The two newest [The camera indicates the Crowleys.] could use a little repair, but they're vintage, so there's a certain charm.

I'm glad to see they didn't leave too bad of an impression after that evening.

[phdmotherfucker]

Oh no, they absolutely did. But my standards have recently hit an all time low, so, they got away with it.

[ A small shrug. At least she's aware of how low the bar is set in these difficult times. ]

Where did you find the desk? Anything else there worth a look or did you take all the good stuff already?

[temptationaccomplished]

[He makes a little pout, sympathizing, and then nods.] They do tend to get away with a lot. Sorry about them, however. Can't take them anywhere.

I do hope things turn around for you.

[And onto easier topics.]

This particular desk came from Pippin. They're mostly a jewelry store, but they have a lovely little cottage attachment where they have some furniture. Of course, if you are looking for antiques on a budget, there's always Big Reuse in Brooklyn or the various flea markets. Most of the shops here around Manhattan touting themselves as antiques are rather on the expensive side. Like O'Sullivan's. Very nice, if a little out of my price range.

[scotch_egg]

Is this what you put up with on a daily basis, Anty? [a half groan. Yes he is being surly on purpose]

[phdmotherfucker]

Oh, I live in Brooklyn. I'll stop by Big Reuse this weekend. Fingers crossed I find some treasures.

[ She pauses when she hears some grumbling off camera. ]

Is that Alec? Tell him I say hi, and that he's an asshole. Just in case he forgot.

[tobodlygo]

Do you uh... Do you need anymore help?

[James almost regrets asking, because going by the looks of things that's already a lot of work but...]

Three pairs of hands are better than two?

[temptationaccomplished]

Why thank you. While I do appreciate it, for the time being I have enough furniture. In any case, these two wont be providing the extra hands next time anyway. They've been quite defeated by the desk.

But thank you...I'm afraid I dont know your name?

[tobodlygo]

Ah, sorry, I had the forumd open while I marked papers just to see what was going on.

I'm James, James Kirk.

[He doesn't bother adding 'Professor', Jim isnt exactly married to the title outside of the academic setting, after all. He smiles at the man, and though he's clearly tired, it's still genuine. Fell will be able to see Jim's study in the background, shelving units that span from floor to ceiling filled with books, books and more books! There’s some nerd paraphernalia artfully placed around there too, but mostly, it’s the books.]

[temptationaccomplished]

Nothing to be sorry for, Mr. Kirk. I hardly expect anyone to be glued to their mobiles--after all, I'm certainly not.

You're a teacher? [A quick glance at Alec's prone form. He used to be a teacher. Might they know each other, he wonders, not knowing about that professor title.] My ...friend used to teach; perhaps you know each other. What grade?

[scotch_egg]

Get out while you can. [his voice is muffled but hopefully still understandable. Also he's forcibly retired, so likely not]

[tobodlygo]

[Ah, that didn't last long did it? He laughs quietly, looking back into his camera with a sheepish smile. ]

No grades at the moment, I teach at Barnard. Physics Department.

[captainspain]

[Jack chuckles at the image]

Please tell me you are going to feed these poor men Mr. Fell they look like they need it.

[scotch_egg]

Piss off.

[he's never met the man before but he is in a grumpy mood and not liable to be...sociable.

But it's nothing personal]

[captainspain]

{Jack smiles, he's been warned Alec is a bit of a grouch by his cousin so he doesn't take it personally at all.]

At least you helped a friend?