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[consortofalderaan]

I think I recall people posting about receiving items from their memories.

Has anyone received something dangerous?

Comments

[consortofalderaan]

Why do you see your journal as dangerous?

[captainspain]

It's from when I was traveling around the country before I came to New York...for some reason my sister sent it to me.

I'm a little afraid to remind myself of the things I did back then. Weird right?

[consortofalderaan]

Why don't you want to remember that time?

[captainspain]

I was living hand to mouth and at my lowest point I did a few things I'm not proud of.

I'm not that person anymore and I feel like with everything going on right now...being reminded of that would hurt.

[consortofalderaan]

Have you made amends for that time?

[captainspain]

I'm trying to....an act at a time.

It never feels like enough though.

[consortofalderaan]

Do you feel the need to make amends for every act you're ashamed of or do you think you could consider a number of individual acts pieces of a greater whole and make amends towards that greater whole instead?

[captainspain]

I've been trying to pay it forward in small ways...mentoring other actors, helping people in need things like that. But it never feels like enough.

It's weird but ever since my Event it feels like there is this weight on me I can't get rid of. And reading the journal recently has made that feeling worse.